Ok, I am going to bring this up hoping for a somewhat serious answer. Has anyone done a study to determine where women derive their logic? I mean this in regards to a specific process, wherein a woman gives choices A and B. When man gives preference to 'A', then in the woman's head 'B' is now a hated choice by the male, even though the man said nothing of the sort and can even state that he does in fact like B. The woman will still think that the man dislikes B.
Example:
"Honey, which of these dresses to you like better? The Blue or the Red?"
"I like the Blue better."
"Why don't you like the red?"
Now, you will notice that the man never said he doesn't like the red. In fact, by saying what he did, it is probable that he actually likes the red. Had he disliked the red, he probably wouldn't have used it as a means to elevate his like of the blue. Had he disliked the red, his statement of liking the blue better doesn't even mean he likes the blue.
Now, seriously, where does this come from? Women are supposed to be the stronger communicators. Yet somewhere, be it biological or environmental, they picked up a tendancy to make everything black and white. If it isn't the prettiest, it's ugly. If it isn't skinny, it's fat. If it isn't sexy, it's disgusting.
Why did we bother to invent all of these qualifiers and degrees of things if women are just going to break everything down into 1's and 0's? Oh...I may have just stumbled across something there. I will have to think more on it. And hope that some women post here and give me some insight.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
7 comments:
Hard for me to comment on these examples, because I don't process information this way. Once someone tells me, "You look good in A," I'm not really thinking about B unless I loved B. In which case, I wouldn't have asked. I think part of it is that women are trained via advertising and media to pick themselves and their choices apart and to talk things to death.
Part of it is just messing with you.
The other part is trying to get you to express something more than a robotic, "yes, you look great," like an actual honest opinion.
And part of it is because we really want to know. I think when women ask each other these questions, the other woman will elaborate, as in, "I like the blue dress. It brings out your eyes. The red dress is nice, too, but it doesn't look as good as the blue."
Men just say yes or no. That's frustrating.
Women are computers?
Since I am not a woman, I cannot come up with a serious answer, but here's a shot.
They don't really care what answer you give, the point is in finding out whether or not you care to actually take the time to decide. I always go with honesty, and people have learned to only ask me those questions if they want a real answer.
Because, yes, your ass looks fat, but I'd hit that anyways.
Most studies have shown that women use both hemispheres of their brains for most tasks, thus increasing their ability to multitask(yes, I realize this means we need more brain power to do simple things, you should see me try to play a FPS video game in 3-D yeah, not pretty). Using both hemispheres means we are supposed to be better communicators, but it also means every piece of information has emotion attached to it (typically). It's like why women remember dates better than most men. Because we associate it with a lot of other pieces of information, and it's stored in more areas of our brain. So, by you saying your preference, she attaches some sort of emotion to that response, because that’s how she communicates.
Now, why do we do what you've described? For the most part, I'd say you've over generalized. The question “why don’t you like the red” can be construed two ways: “Why do you hate the red” or “What don’t you like about the red”. The second question may be a much better representation of her follow-up question. On the other hand, a more realistic answer to this is that the woman has some esteem issues and tends to reject anything she thinks you don’t like, in an overt attempt to do what she perceives you want. Sad, but true.
BTW, I find this interesting, especially considering your stereotypical man thoughts from the other day. :) We react that way because men keep checklists of 'doable' women in their heads. :)
Lyza, thanks for the insight. I had heard about the brain thing before. I wish society would more openly acknowledge our differences so we can better leverage them.
While I got you here, how did you find my blog? Glad to have you, just curious.
Also, hope you don't take any offense to my various posts :)
It actually takes a lot to offend me, and if I were offended, I wouldn't keep coming back. :)
Let's just say a little bird told me about your blog, and I decided to check it out. Glad I did.
GAH! Must. Know. Bird's. Name!
Post a Comment